Love With A Crazy Girl
by Juriko Samsuni
Summary: A girl found by Hidan and Itachi and now she's in love with them. She's also a member of the Akatsuki! Lots of lemons and yaoi in chapter 3 and up!
1. The Fall

Well, this is my first story. I haven't watched Naruto or Naruto Shippuuden in so long so I'm going to be off with the story. Please rate and review. Be gentle

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><p>Dark skies, swaying trees, water dripping off each leaf, below all of that was a girl, walking along it all. She did not look like all the girls you usually see. She wasn't small; she was actually tall, about 5 feet 10 inches. She didn't own a tiny, cute body frame. Her hips curved, it was a natural curve but no man ever paid attention. Long black hair with purple streaks flowed with waves down her back.<p>

Slender legs were shown with a lovely tan, emphasized by a blue skirt with purple and black polka dots mid-way down her thighs. A black tank top emphasized her breasts, though quoted by her that they were small. She wore heeled boots that were long-legged, black and leather.

Not the perfect outfit for an akatsuki member, she knows, the same exact reason she wore it. She wanted to wear something very revealing.

She walked through the door of the hide out yelling, "I brought food! Come get it before I eat it all!" The next thing she felt was a creature tackle her to the floor.

"Tobi! Get the fuck off of me!"

"But Kata, you brought food. I'm really hungry and happy."

Kata didn't like to be tackled but she felt like she was the mother of the group. Even though Konan lived with them, she wasn't as motherly. Tobi dug through the bag of food and took a hot sandwich and a can of tea.

"Arigato, Kata!" Tobi said with a cheering voice and ran off to eat his food.

"Where is everyone else?" Kata asked with a depressed look on her face. She was looking forward to showing Hidan and Itachi her choice of clothing. Believe it or not, she was in love with the immortal bastard and family murderer. She knew it was wrong to be in love with both of them, but she couldn't help it.

When Hidan found Kata, she was shivering cold in the rain with blood on her face and hands. It looked like she killed a few people out of protection. He didn't slaughter her, like he usually would with any person he saw even remotely strong or threatening. He showed her to Itachi and they brought Kata back to the base. Ever since then, Kata had been trying to get their attention with floozy outfits, walking out the shower in only a towel, and saying the most sexual thing she could think of.

"They all went to the back." Konan said while digging her grubby little hands through the bag taking most of the fatty foods. It looked like Konan was giving up on keeping her body skinny for Pein. He hadn't paid attention to her in months. Kata didn't care about Konan's problems though; she was more worried that neither Hidan nor Itachi would pay attention to her.

Kata walked down the hall and looked at the sign on the door to the room she was seeking. She laughed at the words and walked in the room, not caring if anyone yelled at her for barging in. She fell over. Not just any type of fall either. It was one of those falls where you want to bash a person on their head for being retarded.

Then, what she saw was weird. Hidan was laughing. So was Itachi. Neither of them ever laughed. With all the seriousness and confusion she could hold, she slowly walked over to the laughing commotion. Then she realized something. They were the only 3 in the room.

Kisame went to train with Sasori. Deidara went to torture people with his art. Pein was in his room, no one cared though. Kakuzu was on a mission, somehow without Hidan. No one knew where Zetsu was.

"Well, this is odd." Kata made Hidan jump when she suddenly spoke. Itachi started to laugh even harder than before. Then Kata saw what they were laughing at.

"Kata, these pictures of you when you first moved here are so funny." Itachi stated, spitting out his laughter. Hidan wiped the spit off his face.

"Dude, that's just disgusting. Don't do that again, I beg of you." Kata just watched as Itachi and Hidan battle out their situation of Itachi's spit flying everywhere. Hidan then finally turned his head toward Kata and looked at her outfit.

"Kata, what the hell are you wearing?"

"Oh, you finally notice, huh?" Itachi took a deep breath and turned his head toward Kata as well.

"Well, I like it. It shows off her body shape." "Well, thank you Itachi. At least someone knows fashion." Kata glared at Hidan but all he did was roll his eyes. Hidan never thought of Kata as more than the little sister he never had. He never even thought of having a girlfriend actually. At least Itachi and Kata kissed a few times, all as accidents, though.

Once, Kata banged into Itachi walking down the hall and their lips locked. Both of their noses were hurting at that point. Sadly, that was Kata's first kiss, but she loved it. Another time, Itachi was tired from a mission he was on and was walking through the living room to his bedroom. He tripped over a stick. He didn't know how it got there but he didn't care. Then he looked down. Kata was underneath him and their lips were locked once again. Itachi had widened eyes. He got up and jetted to his room. Kata could barely see the blush on his face. Anyway, back to the task at hand: Hidan.

Even if Hidan thought of Kata as more than a little sister he still wouldn't date her. Hidan was just too stubborn to admit anything so he would never admit he would date her.

"Take it off." Hidan said with a serious look on his face. Kata could tell that Hidan was serious. His face was something she hadn't seen before: so pissed off. So, Kata did what he told her. Right then and there she started undressing, starting with slowly pulling off her tank top. As soon as her top shirt came off, simultaneously Hidan and Itachi both shouted "Put it on!" She stopped. Why did they want her to put it back on?

"I meant go change in your room, Kata!" Hidan said with a stern and manly voice. She turned to him and shouted "No! I won't change! You guys never pay attention to me ever! So why should I listen to you? You laugh at me, tell me what to do, and only think of me as a child." She started counting each complaint on her fingers with her thumb as 1, her pointer as 2 and her middle finger as 3. Hidan and Itachi just smiled because she looked at a child stating her case with a serious but childish look on her face.

"Kata, you're too young to be wearing that shit out the base! What if you get raped?" Hidan shivered at what he just said. _Getting raped_, he thought. Kata ran out the room screaming "I won't get raped! You guys are just assholes! I'm fucking in my 20's and I'm too young?" Itachi and Hidan had a look on their faces saying that they should catch her. Before either of them had time to look at each other, both of them sprang into action to catch the crazy girl from hurting herself.

Hidan followed the sound of heels hitting the floor as Kata ran. Itachi did a roll like in Mission: Impossible, which made Hidan bend over holding his stomach laughing. Suddenly, Itachi heard a sliding door and knew it was Kata going to the balcony. Hidan knew he had to stop her. Itachi was the first to dash. Hidan never saw a face on Itachi like what he saw then: so determined and frightened for his life. Hidan followed after with the same look.

"Don't come near me!" Kata said standing on the ledge of the balcony. Itachi and Hidan got there just before things got bad. Itachi was the first to speak saying "Get down from there! You are 30 feet in the air, you could fall!" Kata wasn't listening. She was so mad at them for treating her like a child she would do anything to make them respect her.

A storm was passing, meaning the winds were pretty strong, strong enough to blow her away. First, the wind swept passed her skirt, making it fly up. Kata lost her balance for a second holding down the skirt. Hidan and Itachi watched in terror and shock. They knew if they touched her to get her down, she would beat the shit out of them, starting with the only thing that made them feel manly. They also saw her panties.

"Kata! Get your ass down right now!" Itachi finally said something remotely convincing. He hasn't cursed at Kata ever. That meant he was serious. Kata started shaking. She knew she had to get down then and there. Then came the part Hidan feared the most, when it felt like a movie; as soon the heroine stepped down, she's blown away by a gust of wind. Hidan rushed to grab her but he was too late.

She fell, by that damn gust of wind. Her eyes were wide, no scream intended. Hidan and Itachi, running at the speed of light, grabbed her. Unfortunately, all 3 of them fell down; fell 30 stories to a place covered with water and trees seen on a tiny island on top. No one heard a scream. Not one…

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><p>Okay. Be ready for Chapter 2. It's going to be EPIC! Forgot to say, there will be yaoi and lemons. DON'T GO ON IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE SHIT I ADD! Amen...<p> 


	2. The Trapped

Well, this is finally chapter 2. I am going to be adding warnings to the rest of the chapters because there will be lemons, some yaoi and some not. LOTS OF FUCKING LEMONY GOODNESS!

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><p>Falling the 30 feet down wasn't the shock Kata had on her face. The shock was that both Itachi and Hidan jumped after her. She wasn't screaming. She wasn't flailing her arms or legs. Just falling, her body straight as a stick.<p>

Hidan wrapped his arms around Kata's waist; Itachi putting his left hand on the back of her head and gliding under her.

After a full 1 long minute of falling to their so-called 'death', all 3 of them land in a tree, tumbling down each branch and limb attached.

The next thing Itachi knew before he passed out was that Hidan was attached to Kata protecting her for dear life and Kata was on top of Itachi. His head must have hit a branch or something.

Kata pushed Hidan off her and scrambled to look at Itachi when she heard a _snap_ from behind.

"Itachi? Itachi, wake up!" Kata was practically screaming. She roamed and searched his body looking for where she heard the snap. Hidan started laughing at her determination. Why would he laugh?

"What the fuck is so funny? He could be dead for all we know!" Hidan smiled. Rude, very rude.

"He's going to be fine. The snap u heard was the branch he landed on. You know, you really need to calm down. Nothing bad will happen to us that easily." She slapped him.

Hidan saw tears from her eyes.

"Who the hell do you think you are? You tell me to calm down, knowing yourself how worried I am about him! You're a fucking asshole and you know it! How do you know it was a twig? It could have been his back!"

"Kata, calm down. I'm sorry for making you mad. I just thought it was a little unnecessary to be so worried about an Uchiha. They are capable people, or were at this matter."

"Calm down? You want me to calm down? After you said that shit? Hell no, I won't calm down." Kata turned from him.

She pretended to bend down to aid Itachi, but using her tricks, she ran off into the trees.

Hidan quickly bent down and shook Itachi awake.

"Itachi, wake up. Kata is on a rampage." Itachi fluttered his eyelashes. He opened his eyes and looked around. He looked fucked up pissed off.

"Where's the brat? I'm gonna teach her on how NOT to do stupid shit. Fucking jumping off a balcony like the dumb ass she is. Luckily Cristena isn't as stupid, I think."

Itachi stood on his feet and stretched. Hidan knew they could easily catch up to Kata, only because she wasn't getting far. Sadly, none of them ate their meal so it wouldn't be easy to try and hold her down.

Also, Kata was very exhausted. She didn't act like it but she had a lot of jobs and was very tired. That's why she was only on lunch duty. It was a way to keep her relaxed, and food was her favorite thing in the world.

"You know that's rude. Cristena is Kakuzu's girlfriend. If he heard you speaking shit about the love of his life, he'll kill you, starting with the limb in your pants." Ouch, that comment hurt the soul.

All of a sudden, a scream could be heard. Birds flew off. Leaves fell off trees slowly, swaying with the wind. Itachi and Hidan blink for a few seconds because they are slow.

Wait a minute, a scream?

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><p>Okay, LEMONS STARTING WITH THE NEXT CHAPTER! Please don't read anymore unless you like yaoi, lemons and other stuff. Sorry to those who don't like yaoi but like my story. I don't know how to help you in the end. Rate and Review!<p> 


	3. The Sex

Well, I finally got this god damn chapter up. I'm just super duper lazy. It's a really good chapter, even though I proofread it like Speedo(extremely fast). If you do find a grammar mistake or spelling mistake, don't be afraid to message me about it.

Enjoy ;)

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><p>"Wait a minute! No leaping into action. For all we know it could have been a wild animal being killed." Hidan panicked saying those words. Another scream could be heard. This time it sounded more human like.<p>

"I'm going to find her!" Itachi ran off in the fear of Kata being hurt. That's when Hidan saw.

Itachi was in love with Kata. Hidan knew was something with Itachi. Hell, even the hidden audience could tell he was in love with her.

Fuck it all, Hidan was in love with her as well. He denied it since he met her.

But, there was something about her that Hidan was always attracted to. That's maybe because she always smelt of blood.

Whatever the reason was, he knew that there was a challenge. A challenge of survival, in a forest of death and whatever else is in it. Also, there was a bigger challenge for Kata's heart.

After the 10 seconds of thought Hidan had, he ran off after Itachi and Kata. As Hidan saw Itachi, Hidan hopped on Itachi's back and straddled his back like he was riding a horse.

"Giddy up horsey! Let's go get Lassie!" Hidan laughed shaking his hips. This was fun to him. Hilarious, in fact.

Itachi growled. That was the last straw.

"Get the hell off me! Stop being funny at a time like this! Kata is in danger!"

Hidan didn't want Itachi to go crazy over Kata. That was his job. Hidan is lifted and fell off Itachi.

Itachi was blushing. Hidan forgot.

Itachi was bisexual. Hidan remembered that time when Itachi told him. Hell yeah! Flashback Time.

[Flashback]

It was a night after a big mission. Itachi was staring at some guy who was winking at him.

"Itachi, dude, some guy is winking at you." Deidara said laughing. Itachi stands up and walks to the guy.

"I'll be back in a bit," Itachi said as he walked to the guy and left with him. Deidara and Hidan were just in shock. Itachi left with a guy?

"He must be gay..." Hidan said with a straight face. After a few hours, Itachi walked into the base glowing.

"Hidan, I'm bisexual." Itachi said firmly.

"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA," Hidan laughed and coughed violently the rest of his laughs. That was the funniest moment in his life.

[Flashback End]

"God, this is worse than the time I figured out Sasuke was gay and was dating that fox guy." It's true, Sasuke was dating Naruto. It was hard to believe for Itachi, very hard to believe. Hidan started to turn his into confusion.

"When did you find that out?" Hidan asked, completely forgetting that they should be saving Kata from whatever.

"It all started back before we found Kata, about a month before. I was sneaking into the Hidden Leaf to do a surprise attack on Sasuke for some fun." A surprise attack? What the fuck?

[Flashback 2]

Itachi was sneaking though the trees of Konoha trying to find his little brother. Once Sasuke was spotted, Itachi almost leaped into action. But, he soon paused as he saw Naruto put his arms around Sasuke's neck.

Where did Naruto come from? What were the two doing? The only one in the Uchiha clan to like guys was Itachi, and only Itachi.

"I love you, Naru-chan," Sasuke said kissing Naruto's slim neck, dancing his fingers on Naruto's tiny waist. Damn, Itachi wanted a piece of that ass then and there.

"Teme, I wanna be on a bed when we do it," Naruto said shaking his hips, giggling as Sasuke's fingers slid up and down his back. Naruto was just so tempting. Itachi followed the two as Naruto and Sasuke stumbled into Naruto's apartment. Itachi stayed outside, looking through Naruto's bedroom window. Itachi's jaw dropped when he saw a huge bulge in Sasuke's pants. Now, Itachi wasn't into incest, but, damn he couldn't turn away from the sight before him.

Itachi was caught off guard when Naruto's friends, Hinata and Kiba, walked up to the door and knocked. Sasuke and Naruto had already thrown off their clothes and were down to making out.

"Sasuke, stop ravishing Naruto for a few seconds!" Kiba yelled from the door. Sasuke groaned, not from Kiba bothering his sex time, but Naruto took hold of Sasuke's large erection, pumping slowly.

"Teme, if you leave and you haven't stuck your dick in my ass, I'm going to have sex with Neji and Gaara." Naruto said growling impatiently. Sasuke smirked, a smirk that Itachi would get hard for.

Kiba and Hinata waited at the door, knocking and yelling impatiently. Sasuke ignored them. He slowly moved down Naruto's chest, stopping at his nipples to bite, lick and suck each little pink bud.

"Unn~, ahh~, Sasuke, don't tease." Naruto was moaning and gasping each time he was messed with. Itachi saw a more beautiful face than Naruto's flushed and sweaty face. His eyes were half lidded, hands touching his own neck. Itachi drooled at the sight of Naruto.

"Naru-chan, be patient. You'll feel good soon." Sasuke could as he took Naruto's throbbing member all in his mouth. Naruto's eyes opened wide, moaning and panting. Itachi was watching through the window, his own hand in his pants. He was pumping his own straining erection, groaning while imagining Naruto under him, screaming his name.

He watched as Sasuke stuck 3 fingers into Naruto's mouth. Naruto skillfully sucked his fingers off, getting them slick and wet for the next step.

"Ahh~, mmm~, Sasuke, I think someone is watching." Naruto moaned around the fingers.

"Let them watch. This is a wonderful show for them." Sasuke said smirking and pulling the fingers away. By then, Kiba and Hinata were long gone.

Naruto's mouth opened wide with moans as Sasuke pushed a wet finger into his entrance. Sasuke pushed another finger in, spreading and thrusting the fingers slowly.

Naruto was wiggling his hips, waiting for Sasuke to remove the slick digits. Sasuke added the third finger, soon brushing against his prostate.

Naruto moans like heaven. Sasuke smirked when he found Naruto's sweet spot. He wanted to hear more.

Sasuke kept going, poking and brushing Naruto's sweet spot. He pulled his fingers out, making Naruto whimper in discomfort. The fingers were soon replaced with something much larger and thicker.

"Relax, Naru-chan. This will only hurt for a moment, or so." Sasuke positioned himself at Naruto's twitching entrance. He pushed him slowly, still making Naruto cry out in pain and pleasure in a mix. Sasuke stopped so Naruto could get adjusted to his size.

Itachi was still working on his own erection, closing in on his end.

Naruto gave the signal when he moved happily.

Sasuke started moving slowly, picking up pace every 5 thrusts. Sasuke felt guilty about Naruto's hard member not being man-handled so he started to pump it at a fast speed.

The breathing, gasping and moaning intrigued Itachi. There was a beautiful porn film in front of him. Spying on his brother was the best thing in his life.

Sasuke and Naruto both felt their ends coming closer. Sasuke thrust and pumped Naruto in increased speed. Naruto rocked his hips to meet with Sasuke's thrusts.

"Sa-Sasuke!" Naruto cried as his seed shot onto his and Sasuke's stomachs and chests.

"Naruto!" Sasuke yelled as his essence spilled into and filled Naruto. He pulled out and rolled next to Naruto, snuggling close as they fell asleep.

Itachi felt warmth in his heart seeing his brother in love.

[Flashback End]

"What. The. Fuck." Hidan said. He didn't expect the whole description of the sex scene or whatever.

Itachi sighed. He was a little embarrassed about the whole event that took place.

Suddenly, the bushes started to move and shake. Itachi and Hidan got into fighting position. Then Kata had shown up with an unexpected person.

"Hey, look who the fuck I found."

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><p>Hope you enjoyed this chapter. It was embarrassing to write but I got over it. I will be writing another story and uploading it and hopefully in the next chapter I'll tell you what the title is. Don't quickly look forward to the next chapter because I am lazy so the cliffhanger can kill you all!<p>

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *cough cough gag*


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